Inspired by 20th-century French writer Marcel Proust, we here at Esalen have created our own version of his favorite parlor game to dig just a little deeper — and differently — into our incredible faculty and staff.
The co-founder of Wildtender and co-leader of this spring’s intentional wilderness journey, Wild Pilgrimage: Backpacking Journey to Esalen, Fletcher Tucker fondly remembers a very significant connection he made while working at the Farm & Garden years back — with a bobcat. “As well as the crows that lived in the eucalyptus,” he adds. This lifelong student of natural history lists some heroes (both human and “other-than-human”), shares his love for this sacred land that is Esalen, and speaks with perfect poetic clarity on the healing power of nature: “It really is as simple as walking into the wild, which is patiently waiting for our return.”
What is Esalen to you?
Esalen is an enchanted garden — growing flowers, food, and human beings — a primordial, fertile ground for transformation. Esalen is a vibrant ecosystem — home to countless beings and a rich habitat for mind, body, and spirit. Esalen is sacred land to the Esselen People since time immemorial and now to many more, including me.
What do you do/are you doing at Esalen?
I lead (and co-lead) a variety of workshops that engage directly in building reciprocal relationships with the natural world. I see myself as a guide on various pathways of wild relationality — helping modern people remember and renew ancient bonds of kinship to landscape and our other-than-human relations.
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Resting in the shade beneath trees, listening to the wind move through pine boughs, with an empty mind bathed in the beauty of the wild and a tired body, well-used by several days of backpacking.
Which living or dead person do you most admire in your field?
Joanna Macy, Buddhist scholar, eco-philosopher, and righteous Earth activist.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Stoicism
What is the quality you most like in a human?
Curiosity
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My wife, Noël, and our daughter are my deepest human loves. But there are many other-than-human beings I love profoundly: specific trees, groves, boulders, peaks, valleys, creeks, and stretches of trail in the Big Sur backcountry whom I have visited for many years, cultivating connection, intimacy, and indeed love.
What about your work brings you the most happiness?
Watching the wilderness polish people until they shine!
Which talent would you most like to have?
I wish I had a talent for making my own clothing.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
There isn’t a way to say this that doesn’t sound contrived, but the answer really is my daughter’s life and the qualities of loving kindness, curiosity, creativity, and strength that she embodies.
If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
There are so many beings and ways of being in this world that I admire and try to sense into from within the confines of my current incarnation. It is a precious and wonderful thing to be a human being, but I’d love to spend a long lifetime as a redwood, experiencing that much slower, longer scale of time, living in one place only for millennia.
What would living at Esalen for a month be like for you?
I actually lived at Esalen for almost two years a decade ago when I worked in the Farm & Garden. It was a time of exploration within many traditions, and an incredible deepening of connection with a local patch of Earth and all the myriad beings that dwell there. I formed particularly meaningful connections with a bobcat that also lived on the farm, as well as the crows that lived in the eucalyptus. And I became quite attuned to the sounds and subtle qualities of waves meeting cliffs.
What is your most treasured possession?
I have a traditional Sámi buiku knife with a birch and reindeer antler handle that is always with me in the backcountry.
How do you maintain your practice(s) during challenging times?
I regard this entire modern era (the Anthropocene) as more or less universally challenging for human beings and beyond. But for me, this is all the more reason to dedicate myself to the cultivation of reciprocity, reverence, balance, beauty, awe, connection, compassion, creativity, love, and joy.
What is your favorite component of your work?
Its fundamental simplicity. I have all my own highfalutin concepts and frames for my work. But at the end of the day, it really is as simple as walking into the wild, which is patiently waiting for our return.
What is your most marked characteristic?
Having obsessively studied “nature facts” since I was about four years old, I can say (rather immodestly) that I do have a preternaturally encyclopedic memory for the names and characteristics of plants and animals (our other-than-human kin).
What do you value most in your work/practice?
I value that I must be holistically connected to the land myself to help others sense into their own fundamental connectedness. There’s no possibility of faking it through intellect or charisma — the relationships must be alive in my mind, body, and spirit. I have to show up for my own ever-deepening intimacy with the more-than-human world. I must practice what I preach.
Who is your hero of fiction?
Merlin
Who are your heroes in real life?
I’ll start with a few humans.
And now some of my other-than-human heroes:
How would you like to die?
High on a Big Sur ridge, facing west, with my wife and child by my side.
What is your motto?
We are all kin.
“Remembering to be as self compassionate as I can and praying to the divine that we're all a part of.”
–Aaron
“Prayer, reading, meditation, walking.”
–Karen
“Erratically — which is an ongoing stream of practice to find peace.”
–Charles
“Try on a daily basis to be kind to myself and to realize that making mistakes is a part of the human condition. Learning from our mistakes is a journey. But it starts with compassion and caring. First for oneself.”
–Steve
“Physically: aerobic exercise, volleyball, ice hockey, cycling, sailing. Emotionally: unfortunately I have to work to ‘not care’ about people or situations which may end painfully. Along the lines of ‘attachment is the source of suffering’, so best to avoid it or limit its scope. Sad though because it could also be the source of great joy. Is it worth the risk?“
–Rainer
“It's time for my heart to be nurtured on one level yet contained on another. To go easy on me and to allow my feelings to be validated, not judged harshly. On the other hand, to let the heart rule with equanimity and not lead the mind and body around like a master.”
–Suzanne
“I spend time thinking of everything I am grateful for, and I try to develop my ability to express compassion for myself and others without reservation. I take time to do the things I need to do to keep myself healthy and happy. This includes taking experiential workshops, fostering relationships, and participating within groups which have a similar interest to become a more compassionate and fulfilled being.“
–Peter
“Self-forgiveness for my own judgments. And oh yeah, coming to Esalen.”
–David B.
“Hmm, this is a tough one! I guess I take care of my heart through fostering relationships with people I feel connected to. Spending quality time with them (whether we're on the phone, through messages/letters, on Zoom, or in-person). Being there for them, listening to them, sharing what's going on with me, my struggles and my successes... like we do in the Esalen weekly Friends of Esalen Zoom sessions!”
–Lori
“I remind myself in many ways of the fact that " Love is all there is!" LOVE is the prize and this one precious life is the stage we get to learn our lessons. I get out into nature, hike, camp, river kayak, fly fish, garden, I create, I dance (not enough!), and I remain grateful for each day, each breath, each moment. Being in the moment, awake, and remembering the gift of life and my feeling of gratitude for all of creation.”
–Steven
“My physical heart by limiting stress and eating a heart-healthy diet. My emotional heart by staying in love with the world and by knowing that all disappointment and loss will pass.“
–David Z.
Today, September 29, is World Heart Day. Strike up a conversation with your own heart and as you feel comfortable, encourage others to do the same. As part of our own transformations and self-care, we sometimes ask for others to illuminate and enliven our hearts or speak our love language.
What if we could do this for ourselves too, even if just for today… or to start a heart practice, forever?
Inspired by 20th-century French writer Marcel Proust, we here at Esalen have created our own version of his favorite parlor game to dig just a little deeper — and differently — into our incredible faculty and staff.
The co-founder of Wildtender and co-leader of this spring’s intentional wilderness journey, Wild Pilgrimage: Backpacking Journey to Esalen, Fletcher Tucker fondly remembers a very significant connection he made while working at the Farm & Garden years back — with a bobcat. “As well as the crows that lived in the eucalyptus,” he adds. This lifelong student of natural history lists some heroes (both human and “other-than-human”), shares his love for this sacred land that is Esalen, and speaks with perfect poetic clarity on the healing power of nature: “It really is as simple as walking into the wild, which is patiently waiting for our return.”
What is Esalen to you?
Esalen is an enchanted garden — growing flowers, food, and human beings — a primordial, fertile ground for transformation. Esalen is a vibrant ecosystem — home to countless beings and a rich habitat for mind, body, and spirit. Esalen is sacred land to the Esselen People since time immemorial and now to many more, including me.
What do you do/are you doing at Esalen?
I lead (and co-lead) a variety of workshops that engage directly in building reciprocal relationships with the natural world. I see myself as a guide on various pathways of wild relationality — helping modern people remember and renew ancient bonds of kinship to landscape and our other-than-human relations.
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Resting in the shade beneath trees, listening to the wind move through pine boughs, with an empty mind bathed in the beauty of the wild and a tired body, well-used by several days of backpacking.
Which living or dead person do you most admire in your field?
Joanna Macy, Buddhist scholar, eco-philosopher, and righteous Earth activist.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Stoicism
What is the quality you most like in a human?
Curiosity
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My wife, Noël, and our daughter are my deepest human loves. But there are many other-than-human beings I love profoundly: specific trees, groves, boulders, peaks, valleys, creeks, and stretches of trail in the Big Sur backcountry whom I have visited for many years, cultivating connection, intimacy, and indeed love.
What about your work brings you the most happiness?
Watching the wilderness polish people until they shine!
Which talent would you most like to have?
I wish I had a talent for making my own clothing.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
There isn’t a way to say this that doesn’t sound contrived, but the answer really is my daughter’s life and the qualities of loving kindness, curiosity, creativity, and strength that she embodies.
If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
There are so many beings and ways of being in this world that I admire and try to sense into from within the confines of my current incarnation. It is a precious and wonderful thing to be a human being, but I’d love to spend a long lifetime as a redwood, experiencing that much slower, longer scale of time, living in one place only for millennia.
What would living at Esalen for a month be like for you?
I actually lived at Esalen for almost two years a decade ago when I worked in the Farm & Garden. It was a time of exploration within many traditions, and an incredible deepening of connection with a local patch of Earth and all the myriad beings that dwell there. I formed particularly meaningful connections with a bobcat that also lived on the farm, as well as the crows that lived in the eucalyptus. And I became quite attuned to the sounds and subtle qualities of waves meeting cliffs.
What is your most treasured possession?
I have a traditional Sámi buiku knife with a birch and reindeer antler handle that is always with me in the backcountry.
How do you maintain your practice(s) during challenging times?
I regard this entire modern era (the Anthropocene) as more or less universally challenging for human beings and beyond. But for me, this is all the more reason to dedicate myself to the cultivation of reciprocity, reverence, balance, beauty, awe, connection, compassion, creativity, love, and joy.
What is your favorite component of your work?
Its fundamental simplicity. I have all my own highfalutin concepts and frames for my work. But at the end of the day, it really is as simple as walking into the wild, which is patiently waiting for our return.
What is your most marked characteristic?
Having obsessively studied “nature facts” since I was about four years old, I can say (rather immodestly) that I do have a preternaturally encyclopedic memory for the names and characteristics of plants and animals (our other-than-human kin).
What do you value most in your work/practice?
I value that I must be holistically connected to the land myself to help others sense into their own fundamental connectedness. There’s no possibility of faking it through intellect or charisma — the relationships must be alive in my mind, body, and spirit. I have to show up for my own ever-deepening intimacy with the more-than-human world. I must practice what I preach.
Who is your hero of fiction?
Merlin
Who are your heroes in real life?
I’ll start with a few humans.
And now some of my other-than-human heroes:
How would you like to die?
High on a Big Sur ridge, facing west, with my wife and child by my side.
What is your motto?
We are all kin.
“Remembering to be as self compassionate as I can and praying to the divine that we're all a part of.”
–Aaron
“Prayer, reading, meditation, walking.”
–Karen
“Erratically — which is an ongoing stream of practice to find peace.”
–Charles
“Try on a daily basis to be kind to myself and to realize that making mistakes is a part of the human condition. Learning from our mistakes is a journey. But it starts with compassion and caring. First for oneself.”
–Steve
“Physically: aerobic exercise, volleyball, ice hockey, cycling, sailing. Emotionally: unfortunately I have to work to ‘not care’ about people or situations which may end painfully. Along the lines of ‘attachment is the source of suffering’, so best to avoid it or limit its scope. Sad though because it could also be the source of great joy. Is it worth the risk?“
–Rainer
“It's time for my heart to be nurtured on one level yet contained on another. To go easy on me and to allow my feelings to be validated, not judged harshly. On the other hand, to let the heart rule with equanimity and not lead the mind and body around like a master.”
–Suzanne
“I spend time thinking of everything I am grateful for, and I try to develop my ability to express compassion for myself and others without reservation. I take time to do the things I need to do to keep myself healthy and happy. This includes taking experiential workshops, fostering relationships, and participating within groups which have a similar interest to become a more compassionate and fulfilled being.“
–Peter
“Self-forgiveness for my own judgments. And oh yeah, coming to Esalen.”
–David B.
“Hmm, this is a tough one! I guess I take care of my heart through fostering relationships with people I feel connected to. Spending quality time with them (whether we're on the phone, through messages/letters, on Zoom, or in-person). Being there for them, listening to them, sharing what's going on with me, my struggles and my successes... like we do in the Esalen weekly Friends of Esalen Zoom sessions!”
–Lori
“I remind myself in many ways of the fact that " Love is all there is!" LOVE is the prize and this one precious life is the stage we get to learn our lessons. I get out into nature, hike, camp, river kayak, fly fish, garden, I create, I dance (not enough!), and I remain grateful for each day, each breath, each moment. Being in the moment, awake, and remembering the gift of life and my feeling of gratitude for all of creation.”
–Steven
“My physical heart by limiting stress and eating a heart-healthy diet. My emotional heart by staying in love with the world and by knowing that all disappointment and loss will pass.“
–David Z.
Today, September 29, is World Heart Day. Strike up a conversation with your own heart and as you feel comfortable, encourage others to do the same. As part of our own transformations and self-care, we sometimes ask for others to illuminate and enliven our hearts or speak our love language.
What if we could do this for ourselves too, even if just for today… or to start a heart practice, forever?
Inspired by 20th-century French writer Marcel Proust, we here at Esalen have created our own version of his favorite parlor game to dig just a little deeper — and differently — into our incredible faculty and staff.
The co-founder of Wildtender and co-leader of this spring’s intentional wilderness journey, Wild Pilgrimage: Backpacking Journey to Esalen, Fletcher Tucker fondly remembers a very significant connection he made while working at the Farm & Garden years back — with a bobcat. “As well as the crows that lived in the eucalyptus,” he adds. This lifelong student of natural history lists some heroes (both human and “other-than-human”), shares his love for this sacred land that is Esalen, and speaks with perfect poetic clarity on the healing power of nature: “It really is as simple as walking into the wild, which is patiently waiting for our return.”
What is Esalen to you?
Esalen is an enchanted garden — growing flowers, food, and human beings — a primordial, fertile ground for transformation. Esalen is a vibrant ecosystem — home to countless beings and a rich habitat for mind, body, and spirit. Esalen is sacred land to the Esselen People since time immemorial and now to many more, including me.
What do you do/are you doing at Esalen?
I lead (and co-lead) a variety of workshops that engage directly in building reciprocal relationships with the natural world. I see myself as a guide on various pathways of wild relationality — helping modern people remember and renew ancient bonds of kinship to landscape and our other-than-human relations.
What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Resting in the shade beneath trees, listening to the wind move through pine boughs, with an empty mind bathed in the beauty of the wild and a tired body, well-used by several days of backpacking.
Which living or dead person do you most admire in your field?
Joanna Macy, Buddhist scholar, eco-philosopher, and righteous Earth activist.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Stoicism
What is the quality you most like in a human?
Curiosity
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
My wife, Noël, and our daughter are my deepest human loves. But there are many other-than-human beings I love profoundly: specific trees, groves, boulders, peaks, valleys, creeks, and stretches of trail in the Big Sur backcountry whom I have visited for many years, cultivating connection, intimacy, and indeed love.
What about your work brings you the most happiness?
Watching the wilderness polish people until they shine!
Which talent would you most like to have?
I wish I had a talent for making my own clothing.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
There isn’t a way to say this that doesn’t sound contrived, but the answer really is my daughter’s life and the qualities of loving kindness, curiosity, creativity, and strength that she embodies.
If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
There are so many beings and ways of being in this world that I admire and try to sense into from within the confines of my current incarnation. It is a precious and wonderful thing to be a human being, but I’d love to spend a long lifetime as a redwood, experiencing that much slower, longer scale of time, living in one place only for millennia.
What would living at Esalen for a month be like for you?
I actually lived at Esalen for almost two years a decade ago when I worked in the Farm & Garden. It was a time of exploration within many traditions, and an incredible deepening of connection with a local patch of Earth and all the myriad beings that dwell there. I formed particularly meaningful connections with a bobcat that also lived on the farm, as well as the crows that lived in the eucalyptus. And I became quite attuned to the sounds and subtle qualities of waves meeting cliffs.
What is your most treasured possession?
I have a traditional Sámi buiku knife with a birch and reindeer antler handle that is always with me in the backcountry.
How do you maintain your practice(s) during challenging times?
I regard this entire modern era (the Anthropocene) as more or less universally challenging for human beings and beyond. But for me, this is all the more reason to dedicate myself to the cultivation of reciprocity, reverence, balance, beauty, awe, connection, compassion, creativity, love, and joy.
What is your favorite component of your work?
Its fundamental simplicity. I have all my own highfalutin concepts and frames for my work. But at the end of the day, it really is as simple as walking into the wild, which is patiently waiting for our return.
What is your most marked characteristic?
Having obsessively studied “nature facts” since I was about four years old, I can say (rather immodestly) that I do have a preternaturally encyclopedic memory for the names and characteristics of plants and animals (our other-than-human kin).
What do you value most in your work/practice?
I value that I must be holistically connected to the land myself to help others sense into their own fundamental connectedness. There’s no possibility of faking it through intellect or charisma — the relationships must be alive in my mind, body, and spirit. I have to show up for my own ever-deepening intimacy with the more-than-human world. I must practice what I preach.
Who is your hero of fiction?
Merlin
Who are your heroes in real life?
I’ll start with a few humans.
And now some of my other-than-human heroes:
How would you like to die?
High on a Big Sur ridge, facing west, with my wife and child by my side.
What is your motto?
We are all kin.
“Remembering to be as self compassionate as I can and praying to the divine that we're all a part of.”
–Aaron
“Prayer, reading, meditation, walking.”
–Karen
“Erratically — which is an ongoing stream of practice to find peace.”
–Charles
“Try on a daily basis to be kind to myself and to realize that making mistakes is a part of the human condition. Learning from our mistakes is a journey. But it starts with compassion and caring. First for oneself.”
–Steve
“Physically: aerobic exercise, volleyball, ice hockey, cycling, sailing. Emotionally: unfortunately I have to work to ‘not care’ about people or situations which may end painfully. Along the lines of ‘attachment is the source of suffering’, so best to avoid it or limit its scope. Sad though because it could also be the source of great joy. Is it worth the risk?“
–Rainer
“It's time for my heart to be nurtured on one level yet contained on another. To go easy on me and to allow my feelings to be validated, not judged harshly. On the other hand, to let the heart rule with equanimity and not lead the mind and body around like a master.”
–Suzanne
“I spend time thinking of everything I am grateful for, and I try to develop my ability to express compassion for myself and others without reservation. I take time to do the things I need to do to keep myself healthy and happy. This includes taking experiential workshops, fostering relationships, and participating within groups which have a similar interest to become a more compassionate and fulfilled being.“
–Peter
“Self-forgiveness for my own judgments. And oh yeah, coming to Esalen.”
–David B.
“Hmm, this is a tough one! I guess I take care of my heart through fostering relationships with people I feel connected to. Spending quality time with them (whether we're on the phone, through messages/letters, on Zoom, or in-person). Being there for them, listening to them, sharing what's going on with me, my struggles and my successes... like we do in the Esalen weekly Friends of Esalen Zoom sessions!”
–Lori
“I remind myself in many ways of the fact that " Love is all there is!" LOVE is the prize and this one precious life is the stage we get to learn our lessons. I get out into nature, hike, camp, river kayak, fly fish, garden, I create, I dance (not enough!), and I remain grateful for each day, each breath, each moment. Being in the moment, awake, and remembering the gift of life and my feeling of gratitude for all of creation.”
–Steven
“My physical heart by limiting stress and eating a heart-healthy diet. My emotional heart by staying in love with the world and by knowing that all disappointment and loss will pass.“
–David Z.
Today, September 29, is World Heart Day. Strike up a conversation with your own heart and as you feel comfortable, encourage others to do the same. As part of our own transformations and self-care, we sometimes ask for others to illuminate and enliven our hearts or speak our love language.
What if we could do this for ourselves too, even if just for today… or to start a heart practice, forever?
Esalen Institute
55000 Highway 1
Big Sur, CA 93920
US: 1-831-667-3000
info@esalen.org
