Esalen Institute is open! However, Highway 1 to the south is closed — please review the alternate route directions.

Campus

< Back to all workshops

The Pleasure Bond: A Couples Workshop for Replenishing Love, Romance, and Playful Spirits
May 28 – June 2, 2023
May 28 – June 2, 2023
Stella Resnick and Alan Kishbaugh

Please note: On Wednesday September 20, online registration may be unavailable for up to 15 minutes while system maintenance is performed. If the 'Register Now' page does not load, please wait about 15 minutes and try again.

Register NowBook AccommodationsApply NowApply Now
spot left!
spots left!
Need a scholarship? Apply here.

Need a scholarship? Apply here.

“Working on” a relationship in therapy usually means hard work and very little fun. While it can be valuable to learn emotional triggers and effective ways to manage inevitable differences and disappointments, “getting along” is only going halfway up the mountain. To reach the summit requires broadening your repertoires for joy and playful engagement, deepening bonds, and opening up new possibilities for discovery and connection

Neurobiological research has discovered the phenomenon of interpersonal synchrony: When two or more people are engaged in an enjoyable activity, such as walking, dancing, or making love, their bodies tend to automatically and unconsciously synchronize. Movements become simultaneously rhythmic, and hearts begin to slow down and beat together. Even their brains become stimulated in parallel areas. Emotionally and motorically they are connected and experiencing a “shared present.” They are literally on the same wavelength.

Psychology researchers are exploring how theater games can strengthen the working alliance between clinician and client. This workshop applies the same practices to couples and explores how they may expand their emotional and physical bonds and create synchronicity by playing — rather than just working — as a team.

We’ll begin with group discussions to find out how each couple would like to evolve their relationship. Couples will be offered an experiential process to improvise with each other. All exercises are designed to broaden your current spectrum of face-to-face, heart-to-heart, and body-to-body pleasures. None of the exercises involve nudity or sexual behavior. These improvisational forms of play involve accepting and building on each other’s contributions. After each exercise, couples will have an opportunity to process and explore new feelings and discoveries. Observers can offer feedback and express what they have learned from witnessing these experiments.

Join us for an adventure in interpersonal play and emotional and physical synchrony!

Learn more about the requirements to receive continuing education credit.

Lead photo:
Ali Kaukas
Stella Resnick

Stella Resnick

Stella Resnick, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist in Los Angeles, CA, who specializes in couples and sex therapy. She studied Gestalt therapy with founders Fritz and Laura Perls and Psychodrama with co-founder Zerka Moreno. She trains and supervises therapists and has created Embodied Relational Sex Therapy (ERST), a sex therapy training that she offers on Zoom. She has written three books. Her latest book is Body-to-Body Intimacy: Transformation Through Love, Sex and Neurobiology.

Read More

Alan Kishbaugh

Alan Kishbaugh

Alan Kishbaugh is a writer with many years of experience in book publishing, urban planning, and parkland, and open space preservation. He is the author of the memoir Deep Waters: Frank Waters Remembered in Letters and Commentary. He and Stella Resnick have been married since 1987.

Read More

Categories:
Category :   
Workshop Schedule

Sunday
8:30 pm – 10:00 pm
Monday
10:00 am – 12:00 pm
4:15 pm – 6:15 pm
8:00 pm – 10:00 pm
Tuesday
10:00 am – 12:00 pm
4:15 pm – 6:15 pm
8:00 pm – 10:00 pm
Wednesday
9:30 am – 12:30 pm
4:15 pm – 6:15 pm
Thursday
10:00 am – 12:00 pm
4:15 pm – 6:15 pm
8:00 pm – 10:00 pm
Friday
10:00 am – 12:00 pm

Summer Groovers will experience Esalen in a format similar to our Self Guided Explorations workshops. Each Summer Groove week or weekend will open and close with a circle, and be filled with festive, nostalgic activities that harken back to those days of yore.

More activities can be found on our open class schedule.

See general schedule information including arrival, departure and meal times.

Accommodations & Tuition

Click Register Now to view availability of accommodations and all-inclusive, program-specific tuition. Please note that not all accommodation levels are available for every workshop and additional faculty fees may apply.

We offer scholarship funds for those with financial need. Learn more.

Please note: On Wednesday September 20, online registration may be unavailable for up to 15 minutes while system maintenance is performed. If the 'Register Now' page does not load, please wait about 15 minutes and try again.

Accommodations & Tuition

Click Register Now to view availability of accommodations and all-inclusive tuition that includes lodging, three meals per day, access to the baths, and all activities on the Summer Groove schedule.

We offer scholarship funds for those with financial need. Learn more.

Accommodations & Tuition

For this workshop, you will register and pay for accommodations and tuition in two separate steps.

First, sign up and pay tuition directly to

Second, click Book Accommodations from this page and enter the password to complete your reservation to stay at Esalen.

Prices for accommodations include your lodging, meals, open classes, and use of the baths and other facilities. View partner program accommodations pricing.

COVID Update

As of June 30, 2023 we no longer require a negative COVID test at the time of check in. Please read our current COVID safety guidelines for complete details prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

All guests and faculty must provide proof of negative test results at time of check-in. Please read our current COVID safety guidelines for complete details prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

In addition to proof of vaccination, all guests and faculty must provide proof of negative test results at time of check-in. Please read our current COVID safety guidelines for complete details prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Effective January 7, 2022 in response to the rapid spread of the new Omicron variant, all guests and faculty will provide proof of negative PCR, NAAT, or antigen test results at time of check-in. The test must be taken within 72 hours nd results must come from a laboratory or healthcare provider.Please read our updated COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Effective December 15 in accordance with new guidance from Governor Gavin Newsom and the California Department of Health, all guests, students, staff, residents, and faculty are required to wear masks in all indoor public settings, irrespective of vaccine status, for the next four weeks (December 15, 2021 through January 15, 2022). Please read our updated COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Effective November 19, 2021, in accordance with new guidance from the Monterey County Board of Supervisors, all guests, students, staff, residents, and faculty are no longer required to wear masks indoors on campus. Please read our updated COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Starting November 5, 2021, due to substantial levels of COVID-19 transmission in Monterey County, a mask mandate established by the Monterey County Board of Supervisors will go into effect. Please read our COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

All guests will be required to provide proof of vaccination upon arrival starting September 3, 2021. Please read our COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Masks are no longer mandated indoors or outdoors, except during massage sessions. Guests are not required to provide testing or vaccination verification before arriving on campus. Please read our COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

All-inclusive Pricing

Stella Resnick and Alan Kishbaugh

May 28 – June 2, 2023
Register Now

“Working on” a relationship in therapy usually means hard work and very little fun. While it can be valuable to learn emotional triggers and effective ways to manage inevitable differences and disappointments, “getting along” is only going halfway up the mountain. To reach the summit requires broadening your repertoires for joy and playful engagement, deepening bonds, and opening up new possibilities for discovery and connection

Neurobiological research has discovered the phenomenon of interpersonal synchrony: When two or more people are engaged in an enjoyable activity, such as walking, dancing, or making love, their bodies tend to automatically and unconsciously synchronize. Movements become simultaneously rhythmic, and hearts begin to slow down and beat together. Even their brains become stimulated in parallel areas. Emotionally and motorically they are connected and experiencing a “shared present.” They are literally on the same wavelength.

Psychology researchers are exploring how theater games can strengthen the working alliance between clinician and client. This workshop applies the same practices to couples and explores how they may expand their emotional and physical bonds and create synchronicity by playing — rather than just working — as a team.

We’ll begin with group discussions to find out how each couple would like to evolve their relationship. Couples will be offered an experiential process to improvise with each other. All exercises are designed to broaden your current spectrum of face-to-face, heart-to-heart, and body-to-body pleasures. None of the exercises involve nudity or sexual behavior. These improvisational forms of play involve accepting and building on each other’s contributions. After each exercise, couples will have an opportunity to process and explore new feelings and discoveries. Observers can offer feedback and express what they have learned from witnessing these experiments.

Join us for an adventure in interpersonal play and emotional and physical synchrony!

Learn more about the requirements to receive continuing education credit.

Lead photo:
Ali Kaukas
Stella Resnick

Stella Resnick, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist in Los Angeles, CA, who specializes in couples and sex therapy. She studied Gestalt therapy with founders Fritz and Laura Perls and Psychodrama with co-founder Zerka Moreno. She trains and supervises therapists and has created Embodied Relational Sex Therapy (ERST), a sex therapy training that she offers on Zoom. She has written three books. Her latest book is Body-to-Body Intimacy: Transformation Through Love, Sex and Neurobiology.

Read More

Alan Kishbaugh

Alan Kishbaugh is a writer with many years of experience in book publishing, urban planning, and parkland, and open space preservation. He is the author of the memoir Deep Waters: Frank Waters Remembered in Letters and Commentary. He and Stella Resnick have been married since 1987.

Read More

Workshop Schedule

Sunday
8:30 pm – 10:00 pm
Monday
10:00 am – 12:00 pm
4:15 pm – 6:15 pm
8:00 pm – 10:00 pm
Tuesday
10:00 am – 12:00 pm
4:15 pm – 6:15 pm
8:00 pm – 10:00 pm
Wednesday
9:30 am – 12:30 pm
4:15 pm – 6:15 pm
Thursday
10:00 am – 12:00 pm
4:15 pm – 6:15 pm
8:00 pm – 10:00 pm
Friday
10:00 am – 12:00 pm

Summer Groovers will experience Esalen in a format similar to our Self Guided Explorations workshops. Each Summer Groove week or weekend will open and close with a circle, and be filled with festive, nostalgic activities that harken back to those days of yore.

More activities can be found on our open class schedule.

See general schedule information including arrival, departure and meal times.

Accommodations & Tuition

Click Register Now to view availability of accommodations and all-inclusive, program-specific tuition. Please note that not all accommodation levels are available for every workshop and additional faculty fees may apply.

Accommodations & Tuition

Click Register Now to view availability of accommodations and all-inclusive tuition that includes lodging, three meals per day, access to the baths, and all activities on the Summer Groove schedule.

We offer scholarship funds for those with financial need. Learn more.

Accommodations & Tuition

For this workshop, you will register and pay for accommodations and tuition in two separate steps.

First, sign up and pay tuition directly to

Second, click Book Accommodations from this page and enter the password to complete your reservation to stay at Esalen.

Prices for accommodations include your lodging, meals, open classes, and use of the baths and other facilities. View partner program accommodations pricing.

COVID Update

As of June 30, 2023 we no longer require a negative COVID test at the time of check in. Please read our current COVID safety guidelines for complete details prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

All guests and faculty must provide proof of negative test results at time of check-in. Please read our current COVID safety guidelines for complete details prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

In addition to proof of vaccination, all guests and faculty must provide proof of negative test results at time of check-in. Please read our current COVID safety guidelines for complete details prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Effective January 7, 2022 in response to the rapid spread of the new Omicron variant, all guests and faculty will provide proof of negative PCR, NAAT, or antigen test results at time of check-in. The test must be taken within 72 hours nd results must come from a laboratory or healthcare provider.Please read our updated COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Effective December 15 in accordance with new guidance from Governor Gavin Newsom and the California Department of Health, all guests, students, staff, residents, and faculty are required to wear masks in all indoor public settings, irrespective of vaccine status, for the next four weeks (December 15, 2021 through January 15, 2022). Please read our updated COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Effective November 19, 2021, in accordance with new guidance from the Monterey County Board of Supervisors, all guests, students, staff, residents, and faculty are no longer required to wear masks indoors on campus. Please read our updated COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Starting November 5, 2021, due to substantial levels of COVID-19 transmission in Monterey County, a mask mandate established by the Monterey County Board of Supervisors will go into effect. Please read our COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

All guests will be required to provide proof of vaccination upon arrival starting September 3, 2021. Please read our COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

COVID Update

Masks are no longer mandated indoors or outdoors, except during massage sessions. Guests are not required to provide testing or vaccination verification before arriving on campus. Please read our COVID safety guidelines prior to booking your stay.

All-inclusive Pricing